Dorset Oct 17

 

Dear Uncle James.

            I have intended to write you before this giving you some of the particulars relating to Mothers death but have been so busy & had so many letters to write that it is now a week today since the funeral. I do not remember what day I wrote you before nor what I told you about her sickness. The doctor called her disease pneumonia but the danger was in consequence of her weak heart which had not strength to do its duty on account of the condition of the lungs.

 

            The suffering which she had was almost entirely from / difficulty to breathe. It would come on by spells sometimes once & sometimes three or four times in the twenty four hours, though it was not easy any of the time to breathe & very difficult to speak. any little exertion tired her, though she seemed to have a good deal of strength other ways.

 

            We used steaming vinegar & water to relieve her & some of the medicines seemed to lessen the spasms some. I do not think they were any more severe the last week than they were the first only more frequent, but she gradually became worn out by them.

 

            I suppose there was some asthma connected with the labor for breath. The Sunday before her death she lost consciousness & they thought (I was not there) that she was gone for a few minutes. It seemed to be just a trouble with the heart & not difficulty to breathe.

 

            Friday morning she had one of her bad turns from 4 to 7 oclock & then again at noon. After noon she became easier though she did not get entirely over it but said "—Bertha—" bring out the cloth (of vinegar & water) once more". Bertha says, you feel easier dont you? & she said, "I think I am about worn out thats [?]" but she seemed as comfortable as usual and Father & Bertha both left the room for a minute.

 

            Hearing a sound from Mother Bertha ran back & she seemed to be just gasping for breath Bertha called father but she was done in a minute.

 

            They do not think she was conscious of the change and died without a struggle. She asked father some days before to pray that she might have an easy death.

 

            It seemed so hard to go in such suffering as she had when she could not breathe. 

 

The first few days of her sickness she was planing what she was going to do when she was well but after awhile it came to her that she could not get well. At first she seemed filled with remorse that her life had not been more consistent and she had no charity for her own failings but she gave it all up at last and was happy in meeting in the merits of Christ. The day before she died she repeated to me a verse of the hymn "I would not live alway". We had it sung at her funeral, and once or twice when I came from home she would say "I am here yet". She said she would rather die right away than go through another of those spasms.

 

            Bertha took all the care of her day times and was up every night the two weeks & two days of her illness. I was with her also every night but one of the last

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