Head Quarters 77^th Regt. O.V.I.

Alton, Ills., Feb 14, 1863.

 

My very dear Wife

                        I got two letters from you last night—one mailed on the 9^th and the other on the 11^th. The last one came through in good time, and was so gladly received. I think dearest I am getting paid up for the whole dozens of good sweet letters I missed getting last summer, on account of being in the hands of the rebels. It is so nice to get two or three letters a week from you, and all so full of love and true womanly sentiments.

 

            I am very glad to hear you are all well and that the children are growing and doing so well. I am fully as anxious to be at home with you as you are to have me there, and were it anything but the service of my country, I would resign and go home at once. Still I hope it may not be long till I may with propriety come. I am not sure but another call may be made for troops in the spring, and I may get a commission to raise a regiment, which would take me home for a time, and then I could spend some time in the service again, hard as it is to be away from you. Or it may be, which seems more probable, that the people of Washington county will require my services in a civil office which would be agreeable to you and to me both and we could then be together.

 

            You wish to know whether Elisha's wife or sister Mary went home with him. I do not know, but presume not, or Melissa would have mentioned it in her letter. I send you a letter just received from Melissa.

 

            I suppose you have got a letter from Mary C. Leckliter, as you tell me some news from the folks at Worthington, and she is the only one of them who ever writes. She used to be a pretty faithful correspondent 

 

Mrs. Hildebrand says she is very glad to hear from you, and sends her kind regards, as does the Colonel. They manifest more friendship for me and my family than for any other officer in the Regiment. Mrs. Hildebrand says the Colonel says whenever she wishes to go anywhere and he cannot go with her, he prefers that she should go with me. So you see he must think me superior to some others as a friend and gentleman, or he would not desire his family to keep up more intimate social relations than with others. I guess his difference with me a year ago about politics has not affected him so much that he cannot appreciate me as a man.

 

            I heard of Mrs. Maj. Mason defending me when some one said something in her presence about my politics; and saying there was not more of a gentleman in the Regiment. I never spoke to her half a dozen times, I believe, but she has a good chance of knowing what people think of me. I would like so well to have you here with me.

 

            Mrs. Hildebrand says the Colonel told them not to keep any more stock at home than they had when he left; and that they had concluded to raise a couple of calves without mentioning it to him. She is very anxious to know how they are getting along, and dare not write in her letters to Belle and Cynthia about them, or he would see it and find out about them. She wishes you to ask the girls when you see them, and tell me what they say about them. She don't want to have him fretting about their having extra stock to look after.

 

            I saw Lieut. Barber of Co. D. 95^th Ohio—the company Frank and Henry Leckliter are in—a few days ago. He came up from Memphis in charge of some prisoners. He says the boys are well, and that if they come up with any more prisoners, he will get them detailed on the guard, so that they can come and see me.

 

            Have you heard from Rob. Jordan lately? He was very much dissatisfied with his Captain when he last wrote to me. If you have, give me his address 

 

            You do yourself injustice, dearest, when you say you wish you were some intelligent lady, fit to be my wife. How can you underrate yourself so much as to intimate that you are not an intelligent lady, or to speak as though you were not good enough to be my wife, if I had the intellect of a Webster or the fame of a Napoleon? I am proud of my darling wife and of her intelligence; and only wish I could attain a position in society where I could give you a chance to show your superiority as a lady of intellect and taste—as the wives of Congressmen and Governors can. That time may come and I shall be as proud of you then as now, or as I ever have been. It is true you may have a few things to learn, which it is customary among the aristocracy—in entertaining company—to do; but I have known your intelligent mind—ready wit—and aptness to learn too long and too well to doubt that you will always be equal to the position. You are young enough yet to take music lessons if you wish, and to acquire any of the little accomplishments which you may not possess that fashionable ladies sometimes do—but you are better fitted to preside over a Governor's mansion or even at the White House than many ladies who occupy those places. No lady ever wrote me so good a letter as you do and I don't remember to have ever seen you come out second best in repartee or a trial of ready wit. Please don't undervalue my wife again—I couldn't listen to it from any one else—I love you so dearly, and know how to appreciate you; so you must not think yourself not accomplished enough for me—or any other man. I have often thought—when studying over my affairs—how glad I would be if I could provide for you, darling, the position in which you deserve to live and I had the means to gratify every desire of your heart. I love you so dearly that I have sometimes blamed myself, when my prospects looked gloomy, for having won your heart and hand, without being able to do more for you. I could appreciate the feelings of the poet when he wrote: "I'd offer thee this hand of mine if I could love thee less—A heart so warm, so pure as thine should never know distress." Still we have always been / so happy together, and I have hopes of brighter prospects in the future—so I cannot blame myself for getting so sweet a wife. I couldn't deny myself the happiness of marrying you—and had I known then how sweet a dear wife you would be, nothing in the world could have equaled my desire to make you my companion for life. Before I knew you, I did not know what perfect happiness was—I soon learned, however, the bliss it is "to love and be beloved again". I have been much in the company of other ladies, before and since that time, but have never yet seen the lady that could win me from you, were we yet unmarried. Your mother regarded you as my beau ideal of beauty when I first saw you, and I have not changed my mind since. It is my [faded] if you are "plain" as you intimate in a recent letter, and you will not think me devoid of good taste will you, darling? I never undertook to flatter you—I have no disposition to do so—and I know you to be a woman of too much good sense not to distaste flattery. I may praise your loving and beautiful eyes, your raven hair, your sweet lips or any of your other charms, but that is not flattery but merited compliment, because all I say is true. Flattery is praising some feature in which the person knows herself to be defective or complimenting a lady on some grace which she is conscious she does not possess. Flattery is distasteful to people of refinement while delicate and well merited compliments are not. If a lady should say I am a pretty man, really beautiful or anything like that I could not be pleased with it because I would consider that to be flattery. When Maj. Forman's sister asked me for my photograph to put in her album, I playfully protested against having it placed near the pictures of some of her handsome acquaintances, Lieuts. Scott, M^cNaughton and others. She understood me, and replied: "Indeed, Captain, there is not a finer looking man among them than yourself." I presume she meant that I have a manly or intelligent look as I am not man enough to [paper fold] nor do I care to be thought "good-looking" in that sense. I remember that you say "Handsome men are seldom smart" and am well satisfied with myself as I am. I am glad to have a wife who possesses beauty as I wish my children to be admired—and in that I am fortunate as they are regarded by people generally as the finest looking little pets in Marietta.

 

            Capt. Ross and Lieut Gordon B. West arrived here yesterday looking their best and "dressed to death" as the saying is. Lieut. West got his commission before he left Columbus and made his appearance here decorated with shoulder straps and other gilt edged trappings [faded] Don't you suppose Col. Marshal would think him good enough for [faded]

 

            Tell Cynthia I wrote Corporal Early blush yesterday. I told him the young lady who he said could "get him any time she wanted him" wanted his photograph I guess

 

            I am glad, dearest, that you are pleased to have me go into ladies' society. I am, as you know, of very social disposition, and quite fond of company if it's good—especially of the ladies—and it would be painful to me if I thought you were not willing that I should enjoy it. I desire to cultivate ease of manners in company, and I have a good opportunity to make improvement by moving in the best circles here. You know I am naturally bashful, but I have almost overcome the unpleasant feelings of timidity in company with which I used to be troubled.

 

            Kiss my darling children for me. I wrote Emma not long since and Frank a short time before. I will write to Lee soon. My little pet Lynn will want a ball before he wants a letter. My regards to the friends. Tell Augusta not to think me "real mean"—I will write to her soon. I don't know why I have not written her sooner.

 

Write often [faded] your letters are so sweet.

                                               

With more love than ever and a [?] of kisses

                                                                       

Your husband              AW M^cCormick

SOURCES