Monterey April 26^th 1862

 

            Our mail has arrived dear wife bringing three welcome letters from you. Lest I should forget, I will now answer your inquiry in regard to the business matters. Pay Mr Cooper at once for his horse. I thought I had mentioned this to you before I started, but I suppose in my hurry and excitement I forgot it. He is to have on hundred dollars, but he must return everything which he got from me excepting the pair of fishing boots which I do not want. The cows and Major Anderson you will of course remember, but there was also my double banded deer gun which I must have returned by him. Mr Cooper has acted prudently perhaps for him but badly I think when anything but the immediate possession of the money is concerned. I do not think Burnet ought to buy a horse. He must wait until you return, and then you can tell if you need one. Poor Linda is no longer of any use I suppose and had / better be given away. No one of course will buy her, as she has been lame so long. We cannot afford to keep her in her present condition and I presume there is no prospect of her getting better. When this miserable war is over I hope to return with both my horses and then we will have enough. I made no arrangement with Mr Ellis and I am sorry that I did not. His bill of $25.00 has never been paid unless you have paid it. I am afraid dear wife that I have given you a great deal of trouble in settling these little matters, but hereafter you can arrange them yourself. I am sorry you sent Burnet the key of my desk as there are no papers of Mrs D[?] there and I did not intend any one to open that desk but yourself. It is of no consequence however as I suppose he will be careful and keep it locked. Do not go home until you are ready. How dearly I should like to be there with you. Home must be such a contrast to our present position. 

 

            In my last letter I wrote you that we were having a terrible snow storm, and it continued until the snow measured nearly if not quite twelve inches in depth. It ended in a heavy rain which packed the snow hard and tight but did not wash it off. Today the fog has been thick enough to almost cut it with a knife until about twelve oclock when the sun made its appearance and continued to shine until sunset. The sun was too powerful for the snow and it has all disappeared. Tonight the sky is clear and the stars are shining brightly. Last night in camp all was dull and dismal. No laughter singing or music, but tonight if you were you would think the soldiers were as happy as lords. All around me I hear happy voices singing laughing and talking. The banjo violin and fife are all going in different directions making the whole air resound with merriment. Just now I hear some one dancing upon a board keeping time to the banjo. Soldiers are like / children, they enjoy the present moment regardless of either the past or the future. It is well that it is so, for they have a hard time of it I assure you, and if they only remembered the evil their lives would be gloomy indeed. A bright sun, and presto all things are changed as if by magic. With me it is different. I cannot shake off the responsibility, and bright weather only reminds me that I have the opportunity of working harder in perfecting my men for service. So far since we have been at this point we have only had one battalion drill, and the men are getting rusty. Constant occupation is needed in order to keep the men in proper order. Your mother is partial to me, and I am glad of it, for I value her opinion highly, and hope always to be able to retain it. You speak of the account of our skirmish in the Commercial. I have not seen the account, but it is easy to account for my men being wounded, as they were the only ones under fire. The / other companies mentioned as having participated in the affair were sent out into the skirmish after the enemy had retreated. Before our arrival here the 75^th had obtained a good reputation for everything but fighting, and in this they had never been tried. Now that they have been under fire, and have behaved so well, their reputation as a fighting regiment is also established. We had to be sure only two companies in the fight, but everyone seems to be willing to believe that they were a fair sample of the whole. I very much fear that the whole war in this region will be simply an affair of companies, and that but little reputation can be gained here by any one.

 

I am glad you have received the money sent by Mr Fox. Use it as you please. I know that you will do better with it than I would. Pay day will soon come if the government are regular, and if not only I shall not / suffer as I have enough to keep me for some time. As yet I have expended very little, and our next pay day is the last of this month. I do not really expect the paymaster now, but he will come along soon enough I have no doubt. So use the money without fear whenever you require it. Sat & Burnet must pay their own way & the taxes on their part of the property. They will find that money is not so easy to obtain as they thought, and I hope they will learn to use their money more economically.

 

How much dear wife I wish to be with you at this time. You must keep up a brave heart, and all will come right in the end. Long before your time I hope to be at home with you. You distress me by saying that you are getting thin. Have you a cough yet? If you should be taken sick I should find it hard to sustain myself. Direct to this place "to follow the regiment". Love to Sat & the children & all the family. Loving good night kisses to darling wife.    N. C. M^cLean

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