Head Quarters 2^nd Brig 1^st Div

Camp at Stafford Court House Jany 10^th /63

 

            I am disappointed tonight dear wife. Capt Stuart has not returned with a letter from you, neither did the mail bring one. The leave of the Capt expires today, and I cannot imagine what keeps him. My officers must be as punctual as myself in these matters or they will hear from me in a disagreeable way.

 

            Gen^l Sigel returned today and I suppose we will now have the matter of the command settled definitely, very soon. I hope that all things will be done to our satisfaction, but in these days of intrigue I never feel safe until the orders are issued in writing. Gen^ls Schurz & Steinwehr are both in the City of Washington, and are said to be able to exercise a strong influence on the powers that be, and peradventure / all things may yet be changed. I will hope however for the best. As yet we have no marching orders from headquarters, but grapevine rumors in the camp, which come you know from no source atall, say that we are to be ready to march at twelve hours notice. Who can tell what will be done next? Gen^l Sigel says that he knows nothing, but that the gossip is that every one is at a loss what to do. Unfortunate position. Who will relieve us and the country so as to bring victory out of this miserable uncertainty? Camp life here is anything but pleasant. We have no ground large enough to drill upon for a brigade and so I rest in my tent doing simply office business, excepting when I ride to Falmouth or on the picket lines. My office business for yesterday and today has been very disagreeable. I wish you were here to talk to about it as I cannot fully explain it to you / in a letter. Col Constable has sent in his resignation, assigning as a reason that he cannot endorse & carry out the emancipation proclamation of the President. A brother of Capt Deshler has also sent in his resignation upon the same grounds. This will probably lead to their dismissal from the service with dishonor. But this is not all. I fear that some plot has been entered into by some of the officers of the 75^th to leave the service, and I fear that a wrong influence has been exerted in order to bring this about. I am not atall certain of this, but have had it hinted to me. Six resignations have so far been sent in, all but the two above mentioned alleging disability from sickness as the cause; and all of these officers are from the 79^th. This looks as if some influence had been brought to bear upon them lately which did not exist before. Some of these officers can be well spared, and in fact the service benefitted by their departure. Some of them I have no / doubt will bitterly regret their conduct at some future day. They are resigning in the face of the enemy, and never will be able satisfactorily to explain their conduct should the union course triumph. And triumph I believe it surely will, unless the course of civil liberty is decreed by Providence to yield to despotism. The end may be reached through unnumbered trials, but it will surely come, and our country purified by its trials and sufferings will be better fitted to enjoy that which I believe will be its glorious future. At times I despaired but even when everything looks dark I still have faith that God will not suffer us to be defeated & the wrong to triumph.

 

            May wisdom be granted to our rulers that they may safely guide the nation through this terrible war. I see that Vicksburg is not yet taken, but that Sherman was repulsed. They will try it again when Banks comes up with his force. How much I wish we had such another force marching on Richmond from the south. It is very late and I must say good night with love to Ev Tottie Bessie and little wife— M^cLean

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