U. S. Hospital,

                                                                                                Convalescent Camp Va,

                                                                                                            May 30, 1863

 

My dear friend;

                        Your kind favor of the 5^th inst. owing to the frequent changes to which we have been subjected of late, did not reach me untill day before yesterday. I am sorry to say that it did not find me in health as was the case when I wrote to you some time ago, but it is a part of the soldier’s experience to meet with reverses, be it untold fatigue, exposures in the field, wounds &c. and I bow in submission and thank our Heavenly Father for the kind, preserving care He has bestowed upon myself and so many of my comrades during the weary and bloody campaign thro’ which we have recently passed. I suppose you have heard before this, of the series of battles fought at, and near Fredericksburg, of our capture & imprisonment in Richmond, and of our/return as “paroled prisoners of war.”

 

            I would like to write you a sketch of our experience during the recent campaign. It is one of painful interest but at present I must dismiss all thoughts of exercise, mental or physical, for I am in the hospital and entirely confined to my bed. I have been here nearly a week—am having to a fever—hope the most severe part of the fever is over, for I feel very much relieved. The fatigue, exposures, and the food which we have been obliged to eat have proved too much for me.

 

            Yes you have “come at last”! A happy greeting to you! Would that it were really yourself, for, the presence of a familiar face and a ‘delicate step’ to say nothing of the soft hand and kind words in a place like this where there are so many sick would do more towards alleviating the sufferings of the sick than all the doctors’ medicines. Am not I making quite a concession for an ‘old back’?

 

            Well, you see I am not one of that har/dened kind who belive in the Stoical of doctrine of “total disregard of the Sex”, but on the other hand, am rather an admirer of their many excellent qualities and womanly virtues. And, really, tho’ I have heard and read of so many being “taken in”, and have been “gently admonished” and repeatedly warned of approaching danger, Still I have never suffered any “uncomfortable apprehensions” from their presence and familiarity, but in the event of such a circumstance as that to which you allude I don’t know what effect it might have on my poor brain. Perhaps I might “evaporate” like a comet or turn into a “Sack of Salt” like Lot’s wife. At any rate there would undoubtedly be a “Sack” to it—Well don’t be alarmed! I have stood been “under fire” and stood the test of lightning & hail, blood, thunder and bombs, shells, and if I can stand these why have I not good reason & hope that I might also Survive the dangers and perils of the/“Ordeal” of which your letter is suggestive. Rather think I’m on the safe side yet.

 

            So you are again in Naugatuck. I congratulate you. Teaching is the height of my ambition, but the absence of a thorough training and the lack of an early and extensive education has deprived me of that success which might have attended my efforts under more favorable circumstances. In a former letter you alluded to my visiting your school one day and I had forgotten to ask your pardon for the “remarks” alluded to. I fear you mistook my motive. I had not the Slightest intention of criticising your “method”. It was only an exhibition of the “pumping process” which seems to predominate with me when taking part in the exercises of the school-room. Surely I would not dare to place myself on an equality with one like yourself. No no, I place myself side by side with the most humble of the “calling” and ask no honors nor expect any laurels. In whatever situation I am placed I endeavor to discharge my duties in a plain common-Sense way, and if the world expects anything more from me it will be very much disappointed. So, forgive me, will you not if my conduct had the appearance of criticism? By the way do you remenber of ever getting “caught in a thunder storm”? On our “march” from Richmond to Petersburg Va, we were caught in a terrible thunder storm followed by heavy rain and darkness almost impenetrable. We were 8 or 10 miles from Petersburg, the rebs intended/to have marched us there the same night. It was then about 9 or 10 o’clock P.M. There were some 2000 of us, floundering along in the mud, and bumping each other at every step. One of our boys was trampled on by a horse of one of the rebel officers. It soon became evident that we co’d not proceed and still more evident that we would not, for the boys conceived a very sudden passion for rest and took to the woods on each side of the way with a natural instinct, and in a half an hour we were all rolled up in our blankets scattered promiscuously over the ground for a distance of a half mile each way, or more, not knowing or caring whether it was raining or not. I must say sleep, to me, that night, was as sweet as I ever enjoyed, tho’ undoubtedly it had much to do in bringing me where I am. I know it seems strange, but it is nevertheless true that the soldier will become/so exhausted and weary that he will repose quietly and sleep soundly where bullets are whistling by him like storms of hail and where the thunder of cannon is filling the air with bursting shell and where the shot are plunging above and around him. I have seen this illustrated several times.

 

            “Copperheads” thick there? Ah! that is one great trouble with us at the north and if we fail at last it will be for want of united effort—It is lamentable that we have such an opposition to contend with at home while our trials and hardships are so severe in the field. They ought to know that our cannon and bayonets are the only safeguards between their liberties and their subjugation. A few months experience in the Jeff Davis Gov^t would cure many of the Secession Croakers I fancy. They are too cowardly to fight and too unprincipled to appreciate the/efforts of those who are doing and daring everything to lead the nation on to success and victory. But why waste our breath over them—history will assign them an “appropriate sphere” and doubtless give them all the credit which their conduct entitles them to.

 

            At present all our hope of immediate success hinges upon the efforts of Genl Grant at Vicksburg. We gained a glorious victory at Fredericksburg recently but lost it again in a very short time. While we were fighting them in the rear, a part of our forces took the hights at Fredericksburg—their Gibralter of the Rappahannoc—from which they Slaughtered our forces so feafully on that memorable Dec. 13^th but in their haste to form a junction with Gen Hooker whom Gen. Jackson was threatening in the rear, they left two small a force to guard the positions gained and/thus we lost a great advantage—the very key to Richmond by the Rappahannoc route.

 

            It does seem that victory is not destined to crown the efforts the Potomac Army. And I can attribute it to no other reason than to the corruption and wickedness existing in it. Still will we hope on—trusting and praying that God, in His own good time, will give us the victory and crown our efforts with an honorable and permanent Peace. They have also driven Mr. Huntington away from North Haven, and for no other reason than that he was a true Union Man—I very much doubt whether, in a short time, under the rule of this class of men, we should have any churches at all, or any schools. Their principles seem to be entirely hostile to the advance of civilization or education. But I have already written more than I expected to when I began and so I must ask you to consider when you read the contents of this that it is from an “invalid” and, with my kindest wishes, with the hope of receiving another favor from you, will sign myself.

                                                                                                Your Friend

                                                                                                            R. B. Goodyear.

SOURCES