Office of Supt of Blacks

                                                                                                New Berne North Carolina

                                                                                                Tuesday May 19^th 1863.

 

My Own Dear Wife

                                    I received your letter written last Wednesday just after I had mailed you the letter which I wrote yesterday. I think I have never received a letter quite as quick after it was written before. It makes the distance between us seem much less when I can hear so promptly. I am afraid from what you write that you are not quite as well as usual. I hope to hear however that it is nothing permanent or serious. I am glad to have you write just as you feel so that I can depend upon what you write. but, of course, I allways feel more or less anxious when you / are not able to write that you are as well as usual. I hope the next letter will prove that your bad feelings were wholly due to the east wind &c as you wrote.

 

            I am glad you like the picture I sent you but do not imagine that I look as well as that (ie am as good looking) I am the same red-whiskered, big-mouthed, awkward Yankee that I was when I came from home.

 

I sent you that to show you that I had not been writing big stories about fatting up, and to show to those who never saw me when you wished to make them think you had a good looking husband.

 

            I went into the hospital to see Mr Farnsworth today. he is somewhat better. While I was there the Capt and Lieut Frost came in. They afterwards came in to see me here at the office. I had a very pleasant time with them. They liked Mr James to whom I introduced them very much. They said they should come again / I gave each of them a nice boquet from the garden which pleased them very much. I don’t think they think any the less of me for having filled this position although they would have prevented my detail if they could have done it.

 

We have had a great time today assorting old clothes sent by the N. Y. Freedmen’s Association for the contrabands Mrs. James, a Mrs Harris, Mr James and myself were engaged upon the work We had a nice social time at work Most of the clothing was quite good, but some of it wasn’t fit to throw away.

 

Mrs James will be of great service to her husband in all such matters. General Wilde, who is to raise a negro brigade here, is in town. I suppose the work of recruiting will soon commence. If I was in for three years I would / get a commission in one of those regts if I could and I think I could—Or if I hadn’t any family I would do it now. but as it is I think it will be my duty and most certainly my pleasure to come home to you if spared by Providence to the end of my term of service.

 

But I have great faith in negro soldiers and if favorably situated should gladly aid in trying the experimen of seeing whether they would fight.

 

I think I should prefer a commission in a colored reg to one in a reg of whites.

 

Mr Wood is strongly inclined to go into it if he has an opportunity. He would make a fine officer.

 

These colored soldiers have got a strong prejudice to live down. But if they are well managed they can do it. This willingness to enlist colored men is one of the most hopeful signes of the times to me.

 

I think that whenever we are willing to do justice to all men white or black, we shall be on the road to success.

 

I am happy to be able to write that my health remains good. The weather is very fine now. not very uncomfortably warm. Not as warm as I expected it would be at this season of the year.

 

With very much love

                                    Charles—

 

[margin]

I shall not get time to write to Eddie this time But will try to soon I should like another letter from him very much Give him a kiss for me.

                                                                                                William Means says

                                                                                                he showed his aunt a

                                                                                                little picture he had of

                                                                                                me and she wanted it.

                                                                                                He gave it to her.

                                                                                                I suppose she wanted it be-

                                                                                                cause I was with her hus-

                                                                                                band when he died. /

 

P.S. I see you are feeling anxious lest I should be called in and not be able to stand the drill I think there is no cause for anxiety. The change would not be as great as you imagine as I take considerable exercise now—Besides they do not drill now in the middle of the day still Drill morning and evening now when it is almost always cool. They have dress parade just about sundown. I was up last night. It was a pleasant sight But I do not think there is a prospect of our going in for the present.

 

I was sorry to hear that Ada and little Mary were so unwell this spring. I hope they will soon be better Express to Addison & Mary my sympathy for them. I am glad to hear so good reports from Eddie at school / and I am glad that you do not let him think he can go or not go as he has a mind to. If he goes at all I wish him to go regularly when well. I should rather not have him go but half of the day than to go just as it might happen. If you find it is being to much confinement for him as the weather gets warmer you can take him out. I know you will manage wisely—

 

I do not know his teacher but tell her that I shall allways feel an interest in her as his first teacher.

 

My Father has been a scholar in the Old Brick School house. I have been a scholar and Teacher there and now Eddie commences his school day life in the same place. So the generations of men move on, Each living its own little day and then being jostled away by another. And yet it is a glorious thing to live to make, and receive impressions which will be lasting as Eternity.

 

On one point I think we need to be guarded. We are inclined to look forward and think that when I get home, for instance, will be the time to enjoy life and discharge its duties and we will just endure life till then that feeling is wrong. Every day now is a part of life in which we may do and enjoy as well as at any time in the future. But this is rather of a long P. S. Sometimes I dont know where to stop when I am writing to you

                                                                                                            Good Night Charles

SOURCES