Fort Lyon Va Sunday

April 5 1863—

 

My Dear Mary

 

                        Yesterday I had the happiness to receive a letter from you but the pleasure I felt was sadly diminished after perusing it, and learning of your sad loss. Please accept my sincere regrets and heartfelt Sympathies for you all under this severe infliction and my hopes that you may soon be enabled to rebuild the old homestead.

 

            I have always wondered at the carelessness of the people at South Royalton in not providing for such an emergency. If a fire should break out during a high wind I dont see as anything could save the village from almost total destruction. If they dont feel able to buy an engine why not organize a hook and ladder company which can be done at small expense. There should / be a reservoir on the common a few buckets, with the necessary ladders &c and an organized Company. Nothing can be done at a fire by a crowd of people without some one to lead them. They might as well be abed and let the fire burn as to try to quench it by talking, this one proposing this one thing and that one another thing and all of them doing nothing. I donot mean to disparage the assistance rendered by your neighbors—for which you are properly thankful—doubtless they done all that man could do, but it does seem as if by proper prethought some of the property which is yearly destroyed by fire might be saved—dont you think so?

 

            But we soldiers are likely to have our feelings blunted by war's sad ravages. Not far from here is, or rather was a beautiful village, nothing now remaining but the blackened walls and tottering chimneys. On Friday night March / 27^th there was three buildings, all fine houses of the FFV burning at one time within sight of our camp. Fearing that they might be signals for the Rebels our Regt was turned out and Companies E & F had to go out on picket. We went to the line of fortifications which we constructed last fall & winter the 1^st platoon of F into redoubt C and the 2^nd with myself into redoubt B. About one oclock a cold rain set in which rendered our position very uncomfortable. The men went into the barracks and to sleep but Lieut Ripley and myself with a few sentries were outside to be prepared in case we were attacked before morning. After pacing up and down the parapets for it seemed an age I leaned up against the Magazine door and fell asleep. But that of course didnt last long for a bitter cold north wind was blowing the rain into my face and I awoke chilled through and through. If this child / ever prayed for daylight it was then.

 

            But at last a faint light appeared in the East which soon developed into broad day light and we returned to camp thoroughly drenched with such tears as Virginia only can shed—weeping over the wreck of her former grandieur.

 

            Three of the four sentrys who stood guard on that redoubt that night are now in the hospital sick with fevers contracted during that nights exposure and they too were thoroughly enured to hardships in standing guard about our camp dring the severe storms of the past winter. Thanks to my good constitution and a careful observance of the laws of health I escaped with not even a cold to remind me of that storms severity. I hope that the next time the Rebs come down this way they will select a more favorable night for us to turn out.

 

            We are the advanced Post here now so we have to be particularly vigilant or first we know some of our "Gallant Brigadiers" will be gobbled up by the wary "Chivalry"— /

 

I will say that in regard to your mothers prejudice against me I fear that it was not wholly wthout a cause for I will admit that I was rather a wild dog but not bad at heart. Nothing can truly be said in regard to my not attending to my business diligently and faithfully however, and you saw enough to convince anyone that I possessed the confidence of my employers as well as the business men with whom I lived. Out here too I am happy to say that I enjoy the confidence of my superior officers as well as the respect of the men. I could but pity the men of Co A the other day when I overheard one of the members of that Company remark (as his comrade was being taken to the Guard House) "our Orderly is drunk again today". Men cannot and / will not obey such an officer as that. We have too many such officers in this army already and I think that more than nine tenths of our defeats can be traced to drunken officers.

 

            I thank God that the Colonel of this regiment and the Captain of this Company can be relied upon under all circumstances. The discipline of this regiment is very strict indeed yet there are few punishments. Officers and men are used alike if either commits a breach of Military Law they are punished by Court Martial and not as in many regiments, letting officers do as they please and "Bucking" and "gagging" the men for every little offense. But our "ups and downs" are neither here nor there—of little interest to you I fear—

 

            Lant has been sent to Rhode Island. He went by water and judging from a / letter I recd from him the voyage was of great benefit to him. He will probably soon be at home and I fondly hope better.

 

            Many thanks for the kind interest in the welfare of the poor soldier expressed in your last letter. Such letters encourage him and spur him on to deeds of valor that he may not disappoint the expectations of those who so fondly rely on his courage. The thoughts of those left at home are ever with him. The remark of a dying soldier in one of our hospitals here is full of pathos and tender remembrance of the "kind counsels of home".

 

            "You said you would pray for me Mother are you praying for your boy now?"

 

            You speak of wearying tireing my patience—never fear that, but remember that you have one, to whom you can relate your joys or your sorrows who will weep when you weep, rejoice when you rejoice.

                                                            very affy yours            C.G.B.

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